On Loving Myself

Dear Love, Loving oneself without being “selfish” is an alien concept to me. I’ve never learned to love myself. I never thought that I should until you told me that the best way to love you is to love me. I have always been the negative and pessimistic person in the group. I imagine dark…

Confessional 02

Ang pag-ibig ay sadyang mahirap intindihin. Hindi ito kailanman lubusang mauunawaan. Sapagkat katulad nito ang langit na minsa’y bubuhos, minsa’y titila. Hindi mo masasabi kung ano ang kanyang nasasaisip. Hindi ito kagaya ng orasan na inaabangan o ng salapi na mabibilang. Sa halip, kagaya ito ng edad, ng buhay na sa isang idlap lamang ay…

Rainy Evenings

  Rainy evenings make me feel blue. But don’t get me wrong. I love the rain. I love the sound of it against the rooftops. And I love how it cools this tropical world. But there’s something very sad about it. Like the world is crying. When I was twelve, there was this special place in…

Childhood Anecdotes

I’ve been very tired all week. And I still couldn’t figure out why. Maybe I’ve been thinking too much, worrying too much, sleeping too much. Oh yes, too much sleep could make your muscles sore! At least to me it happens.  Whenever I get inexplicably tired like this, I write it all down. So this…

Confessional 01

Sometimes, I have this overwhelming feeling that I am just a replacement — my existence is simply in place of someone else’s. I have this feeling that I have been molded or that I am constantly being molded into someone else’s image until I become her perfect copy. Perfect but still a copy. Just a…

On Relations and Relating

My boyfriend is such a smart man. In one of our conversations, he made me realize that when it comes to relationships, there is a continuum of people; at the two poles of which are: (1) people who are too selfish and (2) people who are too selfless. Overly selfish people tend to think too…

On Jealousy

I keep forgetting that a relationship in its earliest stages is bound to bring out my possessive jealous side.  On this post, I speak only for myself.  I’ve read too many a literature on jealousy and found them either too generic to be bothered with or too personal to be comprehensible.  That is why this…

12:45am, nostalgic

I grew up around boys. I played with toy guns, slingshots, miniature cars and trucks, and lego blocks. Oh yes, I also had Barbie dolls and kitchen sets, and I had a girl best friend named Roxanne. But more often than not, my Barbie dolls ended up either bald, beheaded, or mangled in some other…